Wednesday, December 8, 2010

The End of Abraxas. The what --?! Read on...

You find me in a state of shock today ... I'd love to tell you that I learned a lot from the experience, or "learned my lesson," or learned something, anything -- but in fact I didn't learn one damn' thing because I didn't, and don't, understand!

This is the end of the Abraxas story -- not that it's finished, just that it's being dropped like the proverbial hot potato.

Why? Because it's just been categorized by the team at Project Wonderful -- as pornography.

I'm not a pornographer. Never intended to be. And here's the thing of it: I thought Abraxas was so tame, it wasn't worth anything close to the suggested MA-15 rating we put on it as a reader guide. I figured it was worth an M, and of course pornography transcends the R rating and goes right to X, and up to three of those. So... go figure.

The fact of this is, I don't seem to even know what the word "pornography" means, therefore --

Abraxas is complete, finished. I'm uploading all the unpublished images right here to just give them an airing because I put a lot of love and time into them. I leave it to you to judge how pornographic they may be. They look like ordinary shots out of a family album to me, but who am I to judge? Apparently I'm ridiculously unqualified for that task.

So ... if you want to save any of the Abraxas art as appearing on the main site, grab it now while you can. The blog/site will be there for seven days to let everyone see the message, and then it will be taken down, and the sooner it's forgotten, apparently, the better! Ye gods.

What's next? I think, a break and a re-think. I need to step back from art and storytelling, get everything into perspective. Find out what "pornography" actually means, so that I can figure out ways to avoid having my work classified this way. (I'd always thought porn was unabashed pics of naked bods, or bods in odd bits of costume, performing in sex scenes to the accompaniment of foul language! Turns out, there's much more to it, which has eluded me for about 60pp of a graphic novel too long.)

I'll be back with more art, obviously ... but it will be a week or two. Don't worry that this blog has been abandoned -- it hasn't! But I do need to have a bit of a hiatus while I think things through, and when I come back the art will probably be somewhat more conservative than you're used to. Because I've had a really good, hard slap in the face today, and it both smarts and is so totally confusing, part of me wonders if there's been some mistake somewhere.

So ... back in a while, when I've found some proper perspective on this. In the meantime, my apologies to all who've either been disappointed that Abraxas is being dropped, or offended by the content. My mistake -- and an honest one, at that. I thought it was mild to the point of being utterly boring to the very m/m readers it was trying to amuse!

Jade, 9 December
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